October 7, 1998

Absolut Crap          7
Salty Dawg I         14

Crap began the fall 1998 season in the same manner as the summer
season ended ... a loss to Salty Dawg I.  Crap is playing the season
in the competitive division 2A.  This is a step up from the summer
division although some of the competition is the same.  Eric Sellers is
expected to rejoin Crap this season, but Crap is losing Brian, Nancy
and Tara.  Brian will play until a replacement is found.

SINGLES
Andrew lost to bulls-eye hitting Sheila 2-1.
Marty won both cricket games after dropping the 501 game to Kathy.
Brian lost twice to Patsy.
Our substitute Dave Velasquez beat Gladys in three games.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap        5
                                        Salty Dawg I         6

DOUBLES
Brian and Dave lost 2-1.
Andrew and Marty lost 2-1.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap       2
                                        Salty Dawg I        4

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap lost 4-0.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap       7
                                             Salty Dawg I      14

Highlights
Crap anticipates a better season, but we seem to have started
in the same ole fashion.  We haven't developed a knock-out
punch yet.  In several games (including both 601 games), we
were unable to put away the Salty Dawg darters even though
we held comfortable leads.  Against tough teams, we will lose
every time if this continues.

Bonus Points:
Marty had 7.
Andrew had 5.
Dave had 2.
Brian had 1.

October 14, 1998

Absolut Crap          13
Salty Dawg II           6

Crap reaped its revenge of getting beat by Salty Dawg I
by beating Salty Dawg II.  This runs Crap's record to .500
for the season.  Crap employed the services of Shu and
Cyndi to help in the victory.  It was a great free agent
acquisition by the captain, but unfortunately they were
waived after the match.  Look for Crap to make a couple
of new moves this week.

SINGLES
Andrew lost big-time to David 2-0.
Marty lost to Richard 2-1.
Shu booted Joe 2-0.
Cyndi stirred Stu 2-1.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap        5
                                        Salty Dawg II        5

DOUBLES
Shu and Cyndi won 2-1.
Andrew and Marty won 2-0.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap       4
                                        Salty Dawg II       1

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap won 4-0.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap      13
                                             Salty Dawg II        6

Highlights
The key to last night's victory was the 601 games.  Crap
was able to seal the victory by sweeping the team games.  Shu
doubled in both games to help Crap get on the right track.  This
was a huge victory for Crap because we couldn't afford to fall
too far behind the leaders.  In addition, I expect SDII to be near
the top of the pack by season's end.

Bonus Points:
Shu had 5.
Andrew and Marty had 2.

October 21, 1998

Absolut Crap            9
Truss Me               12

Last night, Crap (almost completely intact) fell in a close
match to the highly regarded Truss Me.  Absolut Crap
claimed Tony Okrutny off of waivers, and immediately
threw him into the fire.  Eric also played his first match
of the season, sacrificing his higher education.  Marty
did not attend, as he was out of town at a dart convention.

SINGLES
Andrew won his first match of the season over Mike 2-1.
Eric stopped Calvin 2-1.
Jackie spoiled Tony's debut by winning 2-0.
Our sub, Dave took one game against Stephen.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap        5
                                        Truss Me              6

DOUBLES
Andrew and Dave lost 2-0.
Eric and Tony lost 2-1.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap       1
                                        Truss Me              4

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap won 3-2.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap        9
                                             Truss Me            12

Highlights
Crap continued their run in the 601 games, edging Truss
Me 3-2.  We were in position to win the first two, thus
forcing a 10-10 tie, but were unable to finish the job and
settled for a 3 point loss.  It was encouraging for Crap
to play well against a good team, and Crap should begin
to compete for a trophy in the coming weeks.

Bonus Points:
Andrew had 8.
Eric had 4.
Tony had 1.
Dave had 3.

October 28, 1998

Absolut Crap            7
Sure Shots              12

Absolut Crap, less only 1 member lost another close match,
this time to the Sure Shots.  Crap had a chance to pull out
the upset, but were unable to finish the 601 games.  We are
considering hiring the services of a double in/double out
expert for an all day clinic next Tuesday.

SINGLES
Andrew was able to beat Travis on a last ditch double bulls 2-1.
Tony shut out Mark 2-0.
Marty couldn't get off track against Dan, losing 2-0.
Our sub, Dave lost to Guy 2-0.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap        4
                                        Sure Shots            5

DOUBLES
Andrew and Marty won 2-1.
Dave and Tony lost 2-1.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap       3
                                        Sure Shots           3

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap lost 4-0.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap        7
                                             Sure Shots          12

Highlights
Another encouraging night, but another loss.  Crap
seems to be capable to compete with the elite of
Division IIa, but can't get off the snide.  Next week
could be the 1st week with all four members of
Crap intact.  Tony won his singles going away, and
Andrew held on for a victory.  Doubles played even,
but Crap fell on their faces in 601.  Behind by only
1 point, and having a good chance at a win, Crap
couldn't double out thus allowing Sure Shots to win
both games.

Bonus Points:
Andrew had 2.
Tony had 1.
Dave had 2.

November 4, 1998

Absolut Crap             14
Thompson Gunners    5

Crap faced their arch nemesis again after a one year hiatus.
Crap and the Gunners have had many memorable matches
over the years, but that ended when Crap was thrust into a higher
division.  Alas, the Gunners have also been thrust into a higher
division, and Crap's experience in Division II was the deciding
factor in last night's victory.  The idea for Division 2a teams is to
crush their Division 2b foes in order to compete for the title.  The
plan is the opposite for Division 2b teams.  They hope to play a
respectable game, and to maybe steal a victory.  After successfully
accomplishing this versus other 2a teams, the Gunners failed in
their goals against the revamped Crapsters.  However, it wasn't
because of a lack of effort.  The Gunners were in position to win
virtually every match, but fell short.

SINGLES
Andrew defeated fellow webmaster Damon 2-0.
Tony shut out Greg 2-0.
Marty was able to hold off Clay 2-1.
Eric fell against John 2-0.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap            6
                                   Thompson Gunners   3

DOUBLES
Andrew and Marty won 2-1.
Eric and Tony won 2-1.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap           4
                                   Thompson Gunners  2

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap won 4-0.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap          14
                                        Thompson Gunners   5

Highlights
Crap finally played a match with all four members present.
This showed especially in the team games where Crap
outscored the Gunners 8-2 in doubles and 601.  Crap
would like to welcome Damon's parents, Darryl and Doris,
who braved the elements at Poor Paul's to watch the dart
league in person.  They are regular readers of this web
newsletter, and follow the TDL from New Mexico.

Bonus Points:
Eric had 8.
Andrew had 4.
Marty and Tony had 2.

November 11, 1998

Absolut Crap             12
Lofty Pursuits             9

In Battle of the Sexes I, Absolut Crap was able to withstand
a late onslaught by the women of Lofty Pursuits.  Crap jumped
out impressively, but had to hold on at the end - narrowly
avoiding a tie.  The match was held at our sponsor's
establishment, and the home team did not disappoint.  Crap
won for the second week in a row against a division 2b team.

SINGLES
Andrew played his best match of the year beating Dawn 2-0.
Eric shut out Beth 2-0.
Marty pulled out a victory against Christy the statistician 2-1.
Tony lost to fellow C+ darter Gayle 2-1.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap           7
                                        Lofty Pursuits           3

DOUBLES
Andrew and Marty won 2-1.
Eric and Tony lost 2-1.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap          3
                                        Lofty Pursuits          3

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap lost 3-2.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap          12
                                              Lofty Pursuits           9

Highlights
Crap evens our record at 3-3 with the victory over
Lofty Pursuits.  It looked like a blowout early, as
Crap jumped out to a 7-3 lead, but the resilient Lofty
Pursuits did not go quietly and had a chance to pull
off the tie in the second 601 game.  Eric continues
to pace Crap in the 601 games, doubling in all 3 games
including a 112 in this week.

Bonus Points:
Eric had 7.
Andrew had 6.
Marty and Tony had 2.

November 18, 1998

Absolut Crap                     5
Wire Skimmin' Women   12

In Battle of the Sexes II, Absolut Crap decided to take an
early Thanksgiving vacation.  WSW dominated Crap in
singles (except Eric), doubles (except Andrew & Marty),
and four-man (no exceptions).  By being humiliated once
again by the team formally known as Diamonds in the Rough,
Crap will assuredly drop in the Div. 2A standings.

SINGLES
Andrew played his worst match of the year losing to Erin 2-0.
Eric kept us alive beating Tracey 2-0.
Marty at least won a game against Marilyn.
Our cheerleader turned substitute, Melissa lost in two to Duski.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap                    3
                                        Wire Skimmin' Women     6

DOUBLES
Andrew and Marty won 2-0.
Eric and Melissa lost 2-0.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap                  2
                                        Wire Skimmin' Women    2

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap lost 4-0.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap                      5
                                              Wire Skimmin' Women     12

Highlights
With the loss, Crap falls under .500 to 3-4.  We have plenty
of time to dwell on our loss, as we don't play again for 2 weeks.
In the meantime, Crap plans to attend a series of mini-dart camps
to improve their doubling capabilities.  Eric continues to double
in, but no one can follow through with the double outs.  On Dec. 2,
we continue our season, by playing the highly rated Trixie and the
Mechanics.

Bonus Points:
Eric and Andrew had 2.
Marty had 1.

December 2, 1998

Absolut Crap                      9
Trixie & The Mechanics   8

After losing big last week, Crap knew they needed to take
drastic steps to turn around the season.  By unanimous vote,
Crap decided to spend the Thanksgiving break in the jungles
of Chile, isolated from any distractions doing nothing but
practicing their darts.  So, while other teams were snacking
on turkey sandwiches, Crap ate whatever they could kill.  I'm
happy to report that all the hard work payed off!!  Crap scored
a one-point victory over Trixie & her mechanics.

SINGLES
Andrew continued his poor play losing to Bill 2-0.
Eric won the battle of the Erics 2-0 (our Eric won).
Marty fell to old rival Leroy 2-0.
Tony, in his comeback bid, beat Trinka 2-0.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap                    4
                                        Trixie & The Mechanics    4

DOUBLES
Andrew and Marty lost 2-0.
Eric and Tony won 2-0.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap                  2
                                        Trixie & The Mechanics   2

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap won 3-2.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap                      9
                                             Trixie & The Mechanics      8

Highlights
Crap moved back up to 4-4 with the victory over previously
unbeaten Trixie & The Mechanics.  It was a see-saw battle,
with both teams matching each other point for point.  Fortunately
for Crap, we won the final game.  Crap should hold on to
3rd place, but expect a heated battle for 2nd going into the
last 5 matches.  We play our final Division 2B match next week.

Bonus Points:
Tony had 6.
Eric had 3.
Marty and Andrew had 1.

December 9, 1998

Absolut Crap                 16
Hobbit Bullshooters       1

The Bullshooters were the unfortunate victims of Crap's
breakout game last night.  Crap played nearly flawless,
and recorded their largest margin of victory in recent
history.  Crap, continuing their quest for a trophy in
Division 2a, finished their play against 2b foes for the
season.

SINGLES
Andrew took out Paul 2-0.
Eric beat Keith in 2.
Marty rose up and beat Teri 2-0.
Tony handled Mo 2-0.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap                8
                                        Hobbit Bullshooters       0

DOUBLES
Andrew and Marty won 2-0.
Eric and Tony won 2-1.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap              4
                                        Hobbit Bullshooters     1

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap won 4-0.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap              16
                                             Hobbit Bullshooters      1

Highlights
Crap moved above .500, and continued to press for 2nd
place.  Our last 4 matches are against divisional rivals.  If
we can play like we did last night, we'll certainly place
high in the league.  The Bullshooters fought hard last night, but
found a way to lose every game except one.  Crap has finally
seemed to develop a knock-out punch, and looks to avoid any
letdowns for the remainder of the season.

Bonus Points:
Andrew had 3.
Eric had 2.
Marty and Tony had 1.

December 16, 1998

Absolut Crap     13
Salty Dawg I       6

Crap reaped their revenge on Salty Dawg last night as the
USA reaped revenge on Iraq.  Crap, who suffered a 14-7
loss earlier in the season to SD I, was able to dominate in
doubles, and hold on in 601 for the margin of victory.  We
extend our season record to 6-4, and look forward to a
two week break before finishing with 3 tough matches.
Crap has released two photos to the public.  You can
view these by clicking here.

SINGLES
Andrew lost the first game to Mary, but won the match 2-1.
Eric continues his strong play, beating Sheila 2-0.
Marty was able to hold off Gladys 2-1.
Tony suffered a loss to Patsy 2-0.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap      6
                                        Salty Dawg I       4

DOUBLES
Andrew and Marty won 2-0.
Eric and Tony won 2-0.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap    4
                                        Salty Dawg I     0

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap won 3-2.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap     13
                                             Salty Dawg I        6

Highlights
Crap moved to within percentage points of second
place by soundly defeating Salty Dawg I.  With matches
against both teams in front of us, we definately control
our own destiny.  Crap swept doubles last night to highlight
the evening.  After that, we sort of rested on our laurels and
nearly lost 2-0 in 601.  But Tony took out the 2nd game with
a 79, and we were able to win the 3rd game as well.

Bonus Points:
Eric had 5.
Andrew had 3.
Marty had 2.
Tony had 1.

January 6, 1999

Absolut Crap     12
Salty Dawg II      8

Absolut Crap looked very rusty after a 21 day layoff.  They
returned to the field after the holidays and committed
numerous turnovers and penalties which nearly cost them
the national championship.  Actually, I'm speaking of the
Noles, whose penalties and turnovers DID cost them the
national championship.  Crap's rustiness only cost them
a few points.

SINGLES
Andrew was able to beat David 2-0.
Eric wins again, beating Joe 2-1.
Tony took won one game from Stu.
Marty was unable to get on track versus Richard, losing 2-0.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap      5
                                        Salty Dawg II      5

DOUBLES
Andrew and Marty won 2-1.
Eric and Tony lost 2-1.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap    3
                                        Salty Dawg II    3

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap won 4-0.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap     12
                                             Salty Dawg II       8

Highlights
Crap continues to win, albeit in dramatic fashion this
week.  The match was even going into 4 man, where
Crap, on the shoulders of Eric's doubling in and Marty's
doubling out, took the first two games for the final
margin.  We look ahead to a crucial match at the
Hobbit next week.  Crap versus Truss Me for
second place.

Bonus Points:
Eric had 5.
Andrew had 2.
Tony had 1.

January 13, 1999

Absolut Crap   10
Truss Me         10

Crap played to the best tie since the 1994 FSU/Florida
game (aka "The Choke at Doak").  After moving past
Truss Me in the standings, Crap felt the desperation
in the Truss' darts.  Crap fell behind in singles, were
basically even in doubles, but took both 4-man games
to pull off the tie.

SINGLES
Eric was Crap's only victor, beating Calvin 2-1.
Andrew fell to Mike 2-1.
Tony took won one game from Jackie.
Marty was unable to get on track versus Stephen, losing 2-0.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap    4
                                        Truss Me          7

DOUBLES
Andrew and Marty lost 2-0.
Eric and Tony won 2-1.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap    2
                                        Truss Me          3

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap won 4-0.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap    10
                                             Truss Me          10

Highlights
Crap won the 601 match for the 5th week in a row,
this time was crucial for the Crapsters who found
themselves in a 10-6 hole.  Eric, as usual, doubled
in both times, and Marty and Andrew shared the
out duties.  The come-from-behind tie assures 2nd
place for Crap going into the final week of the season.
Crap challenges the 1st placed Sure Shots at the
Salty Dawg in the finale.

Bonus Points:
Eric had 8.
Andrew had 5.
Marty had 4.
Tony had 2.

January 20, 1999

Absolut Crap     7
Sure Shots       11

Absolut Crap ended the Fall 1998 season in an
anti-climatic fashion.  Crap, who were already
assured of a successful season and had locked
up 3rd place, had a chance to win the 2nd
place trophy.  But alas, Crap's schedule pitted
them against the 1st place and only once defeated
Sure Shots.  We fought and scrapped, but fell
four points shy, and will settled for a still gratifying
3rd place.

SINGLES
Marty held off Robbie 2-0 for our only singles win.
Eric lost in two to Travis.
Andrew lost to Packer Dan 2-0.
Tony was beaten by Guy 2-0.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap    2
                                        Sure Shots        6

DOUBLES
Andrew and Marty won 2-0.
Eric and Tony lost 2-1.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap    3
                                        Sure Shots        2

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap lost 3-2.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap    7
                                             Sure Shots       11

Highlights
Although Crap's season ended on a sour note, we
had a successful and enjoyable season.  Marty
was Crap's MVP for last night, winning all four
of his singles and doubles matches.  Eric takes
the season MVP - he won the best male B+
darter.  Crap's off-season acquisitions included
signing a free agent (Eric), and drafting a rookie
(Tony).  Unforturnately hold-outs caused delays
in signing these stars and Crap was forced to play
with substitutes for the first 3 weeks.  Our final
record was 7-5-1, but we were 4-1-1 in our last
6 weeks.  We have a lot to look forward to for
the Spring campaign ... we return all four players,
and each is projected to remain at the same rank,
thus we will compete in the 2nd division again.  We
are actively pursuing a 5th player, either a C+ or
B to add to our Spring roster.

Bonus Points:
Eric had 5.
Tony had 5.
Andrew had 4.