Match Archive

Shadow Company 12
Absolut Crap          5
The Shadow Company snuck up on Absolut Crap in the first match of the
1998 season.  Crap, with renewed vigor after finishing 5th last season, started
the new campaign with dissappointment.  Shadow Company, a first year team,
played strong in the team games and topped Crap 12-5.

SINGLES
Andrew molded Clay into a goose egg, winning 2-0.
Marty, the tyrant, beat Bryant 2-0.
Brian was 'ailin' losing to Allen 2-0.
Tara was more than hospitable to the crippled, losing to a hobbling Jennifer 2-0.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap   4
                                  Shadow Company  4

DOUBLES
Andrew and Nancy lost 2-1.
Brian and Marty were swept.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap     1
                                  Shadow Company    4

TEAM 601 Shadow Company won 4-0.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap        5
                                        Shadow Company    12

Highlights
Opening night at the Hobbit turned into disaster for Crap, who will
likely find themselves near the cellar after their 12-5 loss.  The night
didn't start out badly, as Crap managed a 4-4 tie after singles, but were
dominated in doubles and 4-man.  Nancy, in her first throw of the new
season, hit a 130 in leading Crap to their only doubles win.  Marty
completed an impressive come-from-behind cricket victory in his
singles match.

Bonus Points:
Nancy lead the team with 3.
Marty had 1.
Andrew had 1.

We play the Darty Dawgs at the Buffalo Connection next week.

February 4, 1998

Darty Dawgs        13
Absolut Crap          6
The Darty Dawgs buried the Crap in an instant replay of week 1.  Crap, again
was tied after singles, but fell apart during doubles and four man.  If this keeps
up, we might as well leave after singles.  Darty Dawgs, a combination of the
division II Dawgs and division III Sudsuckers, were able to double in quickly
in each 601 game giving Crap little chance of stealing the victory.

SINGLES
Andrew showed Leroy the south side winning 2-0.
Marty is playing so well it's scary.  He beat Larry 2-1.
Brian showed the heart of a lion, but still lost to Leo 2-0.
Nancy, in a battle of the pinka, lost to Trinka 2-1.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap   5
                                        Darty Dawgs    5

DOUBLES
Andrew and Tara lost 2-1.
Brian and Marty were swept.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap     1
                                        Darty Dawgs      4

TEAM 601 Darty Dawgs won 4-0.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap        6
                                              Darty Dawgs      13

Highlights
Crap played for the first time at Buffalo Connection.  It is obvious
that the team is NOT connecting.  Look for a shake up in doubles
next week at Salty Dawg.  It's still early in the season, and Crap
is definately not giving up hope on winning a trophy.  On the positive
side, Andrew continues his unbeaten streak in singles although he could
just as easily be 0 and 4;  Marty is still hot, beating a "B" darter;  Nancy
is beating her husband in bonus points.

Bonus Points:
Andrew had 4.
Marty had 2.
Nancy had 1.
Brian had 1.

We play the Drunks with Darts at Salty Dawg next week.

February 11, 1998

Absolut Crap           12
Drunks with Darts   7
Crap wins! Crap wins!  Absolut Crap finally shook off the cobwebs, and
took care of business last night against the first place team.  The match
began in typical Crap fashion - tied after singles.  Crap, however, seemed
determined to achieve a better result.  This determination enabled them to
win doubles and four man for the first time this season.

SINGLES
Andrew, knawing on a corn cob, beat Rob 2-1.
Marty played solid as masonry, beating Jason G. 2-0.
Brian's darts are less foggy, but he still lost to Froggy 2-1.
Tara wanted to crawl in a cave after losing to Dave 2-0.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap     5
                                        Drunks w/Darts  5

DOUBLES
Andrew and Nancy won 2-0.
Brian and Marty lost 2-1.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap       3
                                        Drunks w/Darts    2

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap won 4-0.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap        12
                                             Drunks with Darts    7

Highlights
Last night at Salty Dawg was a definate awakening for Absolut
Crap.  We played a quality team, and were able to overtake them
in doubles and 4 man.  The highlight of the night was when Crap
won the first 601 game before DWD doubled in.  After checking
the official Crap record books, it is confirmed that this is the first
time in history that Crap has accomplished this feat.  Congratulations
to Jason of DWD who hit his first ever ton-eighty.

Bonus Points:
Andrew had 8, including a 120 in.
Marty had 2.
Brian had 2.

We play the Breakroom at the Breakroom next week.

February 18, 1998

Absolut Crap           11
Breakroom                9
In a late night dartathon, Crap wins for the second week in a row!
Crap ventured to the Breakroom to face the homestanding darters,
and were able to shake off the slow pace and hang on for a tough
victory.

SINGLES
Andrew shows that he's still caring, beat Darrin 2-1.
Marty might as well been playing with a blunt stick, lost to Eric 2-1.
Brian *&??@  *&$% @%$#*, and lost to Sarah 2-0.
Tara was certainly the MVP - she beat Amy 2-0.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap     5
                                        Breakroom        5

DOUBLES
Andrew and Nancy won 2-1.
Brian and Marty won 2-0.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap       4
                                        Breakroom          1

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap lost 3-2.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap        11
                                             Breakroom             9

Highlights
For the 4th time in 4 matches, Crap found theirselves tied after
singles.  For the 2nd time in 2 matches they went on to claim
victory.  It seems that the team aspect of Crap is finally regaining
the form of old.  Crap won both doubles matches and held on
to the match victory by winning 1 of the four man games.  Beating
the last place team by 2 points doesn't sound like something to
shout about, but the Breakroom has played undermanned twice
out of their first 4 matches, and just picked up a veteran darter.

Bonus Points:
Marty had 3.
Tara had 2.
Andrew had 1.

We play the Hoagie Express Thompson Gunners at Shuckers next week.

February 25, 1998

Absolut Crap               9
Thompson Gunners  11
Crap jumps out to an early lead, then loses to their arch-rivals in a see-saw
battle.  Crap finishes the first trimester (as an expecting father, I'm learning
new words) with a 2-3 record.  The record doesn't indicate that the team
is starting to play much better, and we expect to be in the thick of things by
the end of the season.

SINGLES
Andrew wins round 1 of the B+ darters, beating John 2-0.
Marty came to play, and later beat Clay 2-1.
Brian was able to tear himself away from the keg, long enough to lose to Greg 2-1.
Nancy was able to exorcise her Damons, beating Damon 2-1.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap           7
                                        Thompson Gunners  4

DOUBLES
Andrew and Tara lost 2-0.
Brian and Marty lost 2-0.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap           0
                                        Thompson Gunners  4

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap lost 3-2.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap             9
                                             Thompson Gunners  11

Highlights
Doubles was an absolute disaster for Crap last night.  We came out of
singles winning impressively, and looked to be able to crush the Gunners.
Then, all crap broke loose.  We were swept in doubles and lost the 1st
of the 601 games.  We were able to win the middle game to make the
match respectable again.  Crap will try to regroup and prepare them-
selves for the second tour around the league.

Bonus Points:
Andrew had 5.
Brian had 4.
Marty had 2.
Nancy had 1.

We play the Shadow Company at Poor Paul's next week.

March 4, 1998

Absolut Crap             11
Shadow Company     10
Crap marches into the 2nd third of the season by edging Shadow Company
at Poor Pauls.  Crap was determined not to have a repeat of the first meeting
between the teams where the Shadow Company broke a singles tie en route to a
decisive victory.  With the victory, Crap runs its season record to 3-3, and
looks to make a move upward in the standings.

SINGLES
Hurray, Hurray! Andrew beat Clay 2-1.
They might be a giant, but Marty beat Bryant 2-1.
Do you know the volume of the Atlantic to a gallon?  Brian lost to Allen 2-1.
My nephew can now count to ten.  Nancy lost to Jen 2-1.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap           6
                                        Shadow Company    6

DOUBLES
Andrew and Tara lost 2-1.
Brian and Marty lost 2-0.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap            1 
                                        Shadow Company    4

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap won 4-0.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap            11
                                             Shadow Company    10

Highlights
Crap struggled in doubles again, but were able to win once to set themselves
up for the dramatic victory.  Singles went well as all matches went to the
maximum three games, and we came out tied.  4-man was the clincher as
Crap was able to win both games (aided in part to Andrew's first
ever ton-80 in league play).  Crap left Shadow Company stunned as we
definately snatched victory from the jaws of defeat.

Bonus Points:
Andrew had 6.
Marty had 5.
Brian had 2.
Nancy had 1.

We play the Darty Dawgs at Al Hutton's next week in Revenge Match II.

March 11, 1998

Absolut Crap             12
Darty Dawgs               7
Crap continues to roll, winning their 4th match out of the last five.  On the eve
of March Madness, the team avenged a 13-6 defeat suffered earlier in the
season.  As usual, the match was tied after singles.  Crap rocked in doubles,
and won 601 to post an impressive score which should move them up in
the standings.

SINGLES
Andrew snuck up like a horse outta Troy, and swept Leroy 2-0.
Marty, still mourning the loss of Harry Caray, beat Larry 2-1.
El darts de Brian estas muchos feo.  He lost to Leo 2-1.
Tara spray paints coats made of minka.  She lost to Trinka 2-0.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap           5
                                        Darty Dawgs            5

DOUBLES
Andrew and Nancy won 2-0.
Brian and Marty won 2-0.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap            4 
                                        Darty Dawgs              0

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap won 3-2.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap            12
                                             Darty Dawgs               7

Highlights
Crap finally broke the shackles of doubles despair, and reaped the
fruits of a lopsided victory as a result.  Crap realized the damage that
a good team could inflict when playing well in doubles and 601.  Marty
broke an Absolut Crap record held by current players Nancy and Andrew
when he took a 114 out in his singles game.  The triple twenty, single eighteen,
and double eighteen ousted the triple twenty, double bull (110) that was
the record.

Bonus Points:
Marty had 4.
Andrew had 3.
Brian had 1.
Tara had 1.

We play the Drunks with Darts at Poor Paul's next week.

March 18, 1998

Absolut Crap               7
Drunks with Darts     13
After two weeks of getting revenge on opponents, Crap failed to
realize that teams might seek revenge on us.  Crap beat DWDs
in an earlier match 12-7, but were unprepared for the rematch.  The
Drunks steamrolled Crap at Poor Pauls on a rainy night in Tallahassee.

SINGLES
Andrew likes Lake Speed in racin', he lost to Jason 2-1.
Marty is confused about the sensation of rave, but beat Dave 2-0.
Brian charged through the door, but forgot to turn the knob, lost to Rob 2-0.
Sometimes New Orleans gets very foggy, Nancy lost to Froggy 2-1.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap           4
                                        Drunks with Darts    6

DOUBLES
Andrew and Nancy lost 2-1.
Brian and Marty won 2-1.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap            3 
                                        Drunks with Darts     3

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap lost 4-0.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap              7
                                             Drunks with Darts      13

Highlights
This match was much closer than the score.  Crap played well
in singles and doubles, but blew it in 601.  Andrew was trying to
break in a set of new darts, and lost his first singles match of the
season.  The team had chances to win both four man games to
steal the match, but were unable to capitalize.  This setback could
hurt Crap in their comeback attempt, but the season is only
half over.  Brian and Marty continued their recent streak in doubles,
this was the highlight of the evening.

Bonus Points:
Andrew had 4.
Brian had 4.
Nancy had 3.
Marty had 3.

We play the Breakroom at Al's next week.

March 25, 1998

Absolut Crap               4
Breakroom                15
The trend of inverse outcomes continued this week as Absolut Crap
suffered their worst loss of the season after beating the Breakroom
earlier in the year.  While this sucked last night, it bodes well for
next week because we lost against the Thompson Gunners the first time.

SINGLES
On this vast planet, I am nothing but a flea, Andrew beat Amy 2-1.
Do you use Right Guard or Speedstick?  Marty lost to Erik 2-0.
Does your butt tense up when you feel someone is staring?  Brian lost to Darrin 2-0.
Do you pronounce "the" as "thee" or "thuh", Tara lost to Sarah 2-1.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap           3
                                        Breakroom              7

DOUBLES
Andrew and Marty lost 2-0.
Brian and Nancy lost 2-1.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap            1 
                                        Breakroom               4

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap lost 4-0.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap              4
                                             Breakroom               15

Highlights
Absolut Crap hit rock bottom last night.  The only bright spots were
Brian and Nancy taking one game in doubles, Tara winning once
in singles, and Andrew hitting 6 bonus points, although I sucked
for the majority of the evening.  It was evident that the two teams
are heading in different directions as the Breakroom has occupied
the cellar for the entire season, but made a huge push to jump us.
Crap will once again try to regroup, and find the groove that we
were in a couple of weeks ago.  It doesn't get any easier - we play
the 1st placed Thompson Gunners next week.

Bonus Points:
Andrew had 6.
Nancy had 1.

We play the Thompson Gunners at the Breakroom next week.

April 1, 1998

Absolut Crap               34
Thompson Gunners      0
April Fools!  Actually, Crap lost 12-9.  Thompson Gunners were able to beat
us for the second time this season by using good team play.  As usual, we were
tied after singles.  The Gunners won both games of doubles and the team 601
game to edge past us.  After the second rotation of the schedule, Crap is 1 - 1
against every team except the Gunners (0-2).

SINGLES
That Sam Cassell can really shoot the trey, Brian lost to Clay 2-0.
Do you think David Spade is flamin?  Andrew beat Damon 2-0.
In chess, I don't really mind losing a pawn, Marty lost to John 2-1.
I guess on April Fool's Day it's o.k. to renege, Nancy beat Greg 2-1.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap            5
                                        Thompson Gunners   5

DOUBLES
Andrew and Tara lost 2-1.
Brian and Marty lost 2-1.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap             2 
                                        Thompson Gunners    4

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap lost 3-2.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap              9
                                             Thompson Gunners   12

Highlights
After falling into last place, Crap came into the match with the Thompson
Gunners suprisingly confident and ready to pull off the upset.  That attitude
didn't change after singles, but Crap hit the fan in doubles.  They lost both
matches 2-1, but still had a chance for victory in 601.  Gunners quickly dashed
all hopes for victory by winning the first 4 man game.  Spurred by Andrew's
80 in, and Nancy's double out, Crap won the second game to make the match
respectable.  As a team, Crap scored 5 bonus points on bulls-eyes.

Bonus Points:
Andrew had 9.
Marty had 3.
Nancy had 1.

We play Shadow Company at the Buffalo Connection next week.

April 8, 1998

Absolut Crap                7
Shadow Company       11
Absolut Crap falls short in the first of 4 consecutive rubber matches.  Last night
we lost to the Shadow Company at the sorority-chick-filled Buffalo Connection.
With the loss, Crap solidified their position in dead last place.

SINGLES
Do you believe they're playing baseball in Tampa Bay?  Andrew beat Clay 2-0.
I really think Marty is bachelor-party fearing, he lost to Allen 2-1.
Brian's efforts were gallant, but he still lost to Bryant 2-0.
I heard that there's a ban on fen-fen, Tara lost to Jen 2-0.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap            3
                                        Shadow Company     6

DOUBLES
Andrew and Nancy won 2-0.
Brian and Marty lost 2-0.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap             2 
                                        Shadow Company      2

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap lost 3-2.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap              7
                                             Shadow Company     11

Highlights
Crap failed in their new role of spoiler, losing to the second-place Shadow
Company.  The win may have propelled them into first place.  Meanwhile,
Crap lost for the fourth consecutive week.  Last night we fell behind in singles,
and were never able to close the gap.  In brighter news, Marty hit a nice "in"
in the 601 game, Andrew got a big "out" in singles, and Nancy was smokin
in doubles.  Brian and Tara's singles games were close against experienced
darters.

Bonus Points:
Andrew had 6.
Marty had 3.
Brian had 2.

We play the Darty Dawgs at Salty Dawg next week.

April 15, 1998

Absolut Crap                6
Darty Dawgs              14
This match was rescheduled for Sunday April 19.  No detail available on this
match other than the fact that we got smoked.

April 22, 1998

Absolut Crap               12
Drunks with Darts        5
Crap breaks a 5 game losing streak with a commanding victory over the Drunks with
Darts.  Absolut Crap, playing before an overflow crowd of 2 (former Crapster Eric,
and groom-to-be Steve), played well in doubles and 601 to win convincingly.

SINGLES
When I grill hamburgers, I always forget to toast the bun, Andrew beat Jason 2-0.
That reminds me, sometimes I like grilled corn-on-the-cob, Marty beat Rob 2-0.
The bone from the T-bone is savored by the Doggy, Brian lost to Froggy 2-0.
Oh man, now it's burgers and steaks that I crave, Tara lost to Dave 2-0.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap            4
                                        Drunks with Darts     4

DOUBLES
Andrew and Nancy won 2-1.
Brian and Marty lost 2-0.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap             4 
                                        Drunks with Darts      1

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap won 4-0.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap             12
                                             Drunks with Darts        5

Highlights
Absolut Crap put forth a valient team effort last night at the
Hobbit.  We won doubles handily and swept through team 601.
Although Andrew wasn't on the top of his game, he was able
to get revenge on Jason.  Marty also swept his singles match.
Marty, Brian, Nancy, and Tara combined to sweep the rejected
Drunks.  Nancy's bonus point was a double 15, single 15, and
double bulls-eye in one round.  This helped push us by in doubles.

Bonus Points:
Marty and Brian had 2.
Andrew and Nancy had 1.

We play the Breakroom at the Capital Pub next week.

April 29, 1998

Absolut Crap                 9
Breakroom                    8
Crap continued its winning ways last night at the Capital Pub, beating the upstart
Breakroom by a point in come-from-behind fashion.  With the victory, Crap makes
a serious push to move out of last place.  If they are able to beat arch-rivals Thompson
Gunners in the final match of the season, they should move out of the cellar.

SINGLES
Sarah hit an "8", but still beat Tara 2-1.
That Nancy sure has game.  She beat Amy 2-0.
I have a good feeling that Brian will win next week, but he lost to Erik 2-0.
I went to a class on child bearin', then lost to Darrin 2-0.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap            3
                                        Breakroom               6

DOUBLES
Brian and Nancy won 2-0.
Marty and Tara lost 2-0.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap             2 
                                        Breakroom                2

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap won 4-0.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap               9
                                             Breakroom                  8

Highlights
Absolut Crap looks to finish the season on a winning streak.  We
won for the second time in a row, and took two of three from
the vastly improved Breakroom team.  Crap relied heavily on its
female contention last night, as the women won all 3 of our games
in singles.  In doubles, the husband and wife teams played even
with the opponent, and we were able to sweep 601 for the second
week straight.  Marty's double in of 100 jumped-started Crap in
the second game, which was probably the best 601 game in Crap's
history.

Bonus Points:
Marty and Andrew had 3.
Nancy had 1.

We play the Thompson Gunners at the Hoagie Express next week.

May 6, 1998

Absolut Crap                11
Thompson Gunners       7
In the Spring 1998 season finale, Absolut Crap won their 3rd match in a row.
In a match lasting until early Thursday morning, Crap upset their arch-rivals, Thompson
Gunners at the Hoagie Express.  Crap's onslaught began early, winning singles 6-2, and
cruising home for the victory, thus spoiling the hopes of the Gunners.  Thompson Gunners,
who had slipped into second place last week, threw everything they had at Crap, but
were unable to overcome the suddenly inspired Crapsters.

SINGLES
Nancy has really improved her aiming, she beat Damon 2-0.
Brian is the bomb, he beat John 2-0.
Marty played darts like a guitar by Robert Cray, he beat Clay 2-0.
The TDL voted on a free keg, Tara lost to Greg 2-0.

Singles Score:                   Absolut Crap            6
                                        Thompson Gunners   2

DOUBLES
Brian and Marty won 2-1.
Andrew and Tara lost 2-0.

Doubles Score:                 Absolut Crap             2 
                                        Thompson Gunners    3

TEAM 601 Absolut Crap won 3-2.

FINAL SCORE:                 Absolut Crap              11
                                             Thompson Gunners       7

Highlights
Absolut Crap began the evening strong, and never looked back.
Brian, Crap's MVP of the evening, took down the Gunner's ace
in singles, then teamed with Marty to win their double's match.
Crap fell in the first 601 game, which closed the lead to 8-7, but
won the next two games to achieve the four point victory.
Crap's season ended on a high note as we won the last three
matches.  Crap will not win a trophy as a team, but Marty and
Andrew should win individual trophies.  Crap looks forward to
the end-of-the-year party on May 16, and the start of the summer
session in June.

Bonus Points:
Brian had 2.
Tara, Marty, and Andrew had 1.

End of the year party is May 16 at Salty Dawg at 5 pm.