Final Score:

Duck Farts	6
Fantasy Darts	14

The Duck Farts, also known as Redartation, formerly known as the Professor & the Mechanics began the Spring 2002 season last night at the Bottom Lounge and Karaoke Bar in Quincy Florida.  The rust was evident as the Duck Farts struggled all evening to find a rhythm.  In singles, Erik was the bright spot, beating Jeff 2-0.  Andrew, Leroy, and Rachael took a game each against Travis, Dave, and Keith respectively.  This put us behind, but only by a slim 6-5 margin.  It got much worse in doubles and four-man, however.  In doubles, Leroy and Andrew did take a game against Jeff and Dave; while Erik and Rachael were swept by Travis and Keith.  We were flat-out stomped in 601, losing both games by wide margins.  It was a cold and rainy night in Tallahassee, and the drive home was longer thanks to the loss in the first match of the season.  We look to rebound next week as we take another road trip ... this time to the Crawfordville Hobbit.

Bonus Points:
Erik had 4.
Andrew had 3.
Rachael and Leroy had 1.

February 13, 2002

Final Score:

Duck Farts	4
Luski Bluski	13

The Duck Farts must have had our minds on our sweethearts instead of darts last night at the Crawfordville Hobbit Hoagie Arcade and Pool Hall.  We were shut down in nearly every aspect of the game, and walked away with a 9 point shellacking at the hands of Luski Bluski.  In singles, Rachael swept Duski for our only two points until the very end of the night.  Andrew was swept by Kelly, Leroy lost in two to Greg, Erik lost both games to Lewis.  In doubles, both team were swept ... Andrew & Erik to Greg & Lewis; Rachael & Leroy to Duski & Kelly.  After losing the first game of 601, we were facing one of the worst defeats in team history.  However, we rallied to win the second game thus doubling our point total for the evening.  We dropped the final game to seal the drubbing.  The Duck Farts hope to rebound next week against the Back Breakers.

Bonus Points:
Leroy had 3.
Andrew had 2.
Erik had 1.
Rachael hit a one and doubled out in the second game of 601.

February 20, 2002

Final Score:

Duck Farts	4
Back Breakers	14

On a date and time which is a palindrome (8:02pm in military time is 20:02 02/20 2002), the Duck Farts played darts much like a platypus would.  We were shelled again last night, this time at the Breakroom Pool Hall and Bingo Parlor by the Back Breakers.  But, for the second week in a row, we rallied in 4-man to avoid the history making shellacking.  In singles, Erik managed our only point ... taking a game from Lou.  Andrew was swept by Ernie, Rachael by Tracey, and Leroy by Clint.  In doubles, we were shut out:  Andrew & Rachael lost both games to Ernie & Tracey while Erik & Leroy were swept by Lou & Clint.  After losing the first game of 601, we were down by a miserable score of 14-1.  But we gained inspiration with a round of our namesake, and won the second game to avoid having 16 hung on us.  Then, for good measure, we won the deciding game of 4-man for our 4th point of the night.  We hope to get on the right track next week at Poor Paul's, our home bar.

Bonus Points:
Erik had 5.
Rachael had 3.
Andrew and Leroy had 1.

February 27, 2002

Final Score:

Duck Farts	4
Salty Sud & Studs	15

A disturbing trend is now evident with the Duck Fart Dart team.  We are getting shellacked week in and week out, only to avoid having a 16 point pasting laid down on us by somehow winning in the 4-man event.   Last night was no exception, as we won the first game of 601 to avoid a 16-2 defeat at the hands of the very talented Sud & Studs.  The night began with a ceremonious pep-talk by our sponsor and owner of Poor Paul's.  Then, we proceeded to get whupped in front of the home crowd.  This time, we drug an innocent bystander into the misery that is Duck Fart Darts.  Bob was contacted and agreed to substitute for Leroy.  Bob was willing to be thrown to the wolves, and we matched him with John where he was promptly swept in singles.  Rachael was also swept, she lost to Mark.  Andrew managed a game against Tex, and Erik won once over Sheila.  In doubles, both teams were beaten 2-0:  Rachael & Bob were beaten by John & Tex; Andrew & Erik were taken down by Calvin & Sheila.  This left us in a 12-2 hole going into four-man.  We rallied to win the first game, thus avoiding the 16, but lost the final two games of the night.  After one rotation through the league schedule, it is apparent that the Duck Farts should not be in the top division.  We can only hope to make the matches more competitive for the remainder of the season, have fun on Wednesday nights despite being overmatched, and move down a division next season.  Andrew looks like a lock to be demoted to a "B" at season's end, thus hopefully insuring our descent into a more competitive league for us.

Bonus Points:
Andrew had 6.
Erik had 3.
Bob had 2.

March 13, 2002

Final Score:

Duck Farts	6
Fantasy Darts	15

The Duck Farts resumed our season after a one week hiatus.  Erik decided to take two weeks, so we secured Will to sub for him.  But, it seems no matter who we throw out there, the result is nearly the same.  Last night at the Salty Dawg, we played respectably, but were none-the-less defeated soundly again.  In singles, Will beat Jeff in 3 games.  Andrew took a game from Travis, Leroy won once against Dave, and Rachael was swept by Keith.  In doubles, Rachael and Andrew lost in three games to Travis & Dave while Will and Leroy lost by the same margin to Jeff and Keith.  That put us in an 11-6 hole going into 4-man.  With absolute confidence that we could win both games and lose by a mere point, we charged into 601.  We played well, too.  Both games came down to who could hit the out.  Unfortunately for the Duck Farts, it was not us.  We'll limp into Havana next week to challenge Luski Dluski.

Bonus Points:
Leroy had 8.
Will had 7.
Andrew & Rachael had 2.

March 20, 2002

Final Score:

Duck Farts	7
Luski Bluski	11

The Duck Farts played with our full team last night, and though our darts were respectable, we fell again ... this time at the Corner Bar and Animal Planet in Havana (Florida).  Actually, if you take away doubles, we played even with Luski Bluski.  Unfortunately, you can't ... so we lost by four.  The evening started out fair in singles.  Leroy beat Duski in 2 games, while Andrew topped Greg in 3.  Erik was swept by Lewis, and Rachael lost both games to Kelly.  As mentioned, we fell flat in doubles.  Andrew & Leroy lost in 2 to Greg & Lewis.  Rachael & Erik lost both games to Duski & Kelly.  After dropping the first game of 601, we found ourselves behind by an 11-4 margin, and it looked like another drubbing was in store.  But, we rallied to win the second and third games to close the final margin to 4 points.  This was our best performance of the season, and we hope to build on it as we search for our first victory.

Bonus Points:
Leroy had 6.
Andrew had 3.

March 27, 2002

Final Score:

Duck Farts	6
Back Breakers	12

Using Will as our substitute again last night, the Duck Farts looked to be heading to our first victory of the season.  Then, doubles started.  We played our best singles match thus far, and jumped out to a 6-4 lead on the revamped Back Breakers.  Erik swept Clint, and Will swept Bobby, while Andrew lost 2 of 3 to Ernie, and Leroy lost to Tracey in 3 games.  We entered doubles with all the confidence in the world that we would walk away from the Hobbit Hoagie electronic golf bar with a victory in hand.  But, we were promptly beaten down.  Andrew & Will lost both games to Clint & Tracey, and Leroy & Erik were swept by Bobby & Ernie.  However, even after the doubles drubbing, we still had a chance to win the night by sweeping the 601 games.  The fates were obviously against us this night, and even though our secretary Rachael showed up to cheer us on, we lost both games of 4-man.  We'll travel to the other Hobbit next week ... still in search of that elusive first win.

Bonus Points:
Erik had 6.
Andrew had 4.
Leroy had 2.
Will had 1.

April 3, 2002

Final Score:

Duck Farts	8
Salty Sud & Studs	10

The Duck Farts are improving week to week, and nearly pulled of a stunning upset last night at the Crawfordville Billiards Emporium & Hoagie Shop.  We grabbed a one point lead late into the match, but fell victim to our own prosperity, thus losing in the end.  In singles, Leroy swept Mark; Erik beat John 2-1; Andrew was swept by Calvin; and Rachael lost both games to Tex.  This left us behind by only a point and gave us hope for the match.  The slim margin was left unchanged after doubles as Leroy & Erik defeated John & Mark while Andrew & Rachael lost to Tex & Sheila ... both by 2-0 counts.  So, going into 601, we trailed by a 7-6 score.  We won the first game handily, and were in the lead with a chance at a three point victory.  But, we lost the second game ... and the lead.  Still having a chance to tie, we played admirably in the final game, but fell.  The loss drops us to 0-8, but the close match against a good team gives us hope for the 2nd half of the season.  After all, we lost 14-5 to the same team the first time we played them.  We'll take a bye next week before returning to the Crawfordville Hobbit to challenge Fantasy Darts on April 17th.

Bonus Points:
Erik had 4.
Andrew had 3.
Rachael had 2.
Leroy had 1.

April 17, 2002

Final Score:

Duck Farts	4
Fantasy Darts	14

The Duck Farts began our third 4th of the season much like the matches of the first 4th ... poorly.  For the second match in a row, we traveled out to the Crawfordville Pool Hall and Family Establishment, moved the locals from the front of the dart boards, and challenged a skilled dart team.  This time, it was our third match against Fantasy Darts.  We fell behind early to Fantasy Darter, who were still fresh from trying out for the state team.  The Duck Farts were shut out in singles:  Andrew to Travis, Erik to Jeff, Leroy to Dave, and Rachael to Keith.  In doubles, Rachael and Andrew were swept by Travis and Keith ... thanks to Travis' triple 15 near the end, while Erik and Leroy managed a point against Jeff and Dave.  We lost the first game of 601 to push the margin of deficit to 14-1.  Facing a sixteen pointer being hung on us, we rallied to win the second game, then again to win the third to take the event, and close the gap to 14-4.  Next week, we play in Quincy against Luski Bluski.

Bonus Points:
Erik had 6.
Leroy had 3.

April 24, 2002

Final Score:

Duck Farts	9
Luski Bluski	10

Last night at the Quincy Karaoke Lounge, the Duck Farts came within an eyelash of winning for the first time this season.  The game was tied at 8 after the first game of 601, and the next game was for the match.  We lost in a close game, but rallied to win the 3rd game to close the final margin to one.  The Duck Farts did win two of the evening's three events ... winning singles and 4-man, while being drubbed in doubles.  In singles, Rachael swept Duski, Erik swept Kelly, Andrew lost two of three to Lewis, and Leroy was swept by Greg.  This gave us a 5-4 lead going into doubles.  Erik & Leroy won our only game in doubles, but still fell to Duski & Lewis in 3 games.  Rachael & Andrew were swept by Kelly & Greg.  This gave Luski Bluski an 8-6 lead going into 4-man.  We were hopeful after winning the first game, but lost our bid for a victory in a close second affair.  We dominated Luski in the deciding game of 601.  The Duck Farts will again have to look to next week for our first victory.  We play the Back Breakers at our home bar ... Poor Paul's.

Bonus Points:
Erik had 5.
Leroy & Rachael had 4.
Andrew had 1.

May 1, 2002

Final Score:

Duck Farts	6
Back Breakers	13

May Day didn't bring any gaiety for the winless Duck Farts last night at the Bradfordville Pool Hall & Bingo Parlor.  The match was originally scheduled to be played at our sponsor's bar (Poor Paul's), but was moved to our opponent's sponsor's bar (Breakroom) because of an underage person playing for the Back Breakers.  Despite falling on our faces in singles, we dominated doubles to put us within reach of our first victory of the season.  But, a round of our namesake to fire up the charges backfired, and we lost the remaining games of the evening to suffer the 7 point setback.  In singles, Erik led the way, beating Clint 2-1.  The rest of the Duck Farts were swept:  Andrew by Ernie, Leroy by Chris, and Rachael by Tracey.  This left us in an 7-2 hole going into doubles, where for the first time of the season we won both matches.  Andrew & Rachael defeated Ernie and Chris in three games, while Erik and Leroy won by the same margin over Tracey & Clint.  This closed the margin to 9-6 going into 4-man.  A two game sweep would have won the match for the Duck Farts.  Instead, we fell flat in both games, losing the night and continuing our winless streak to 11 games.  We'll try again for our first win next week at the Hobbit against Salty Sud and Studs.

Bonus Points:
Erik had 4.
Leroy had 3.
Andrew had 1.

May 8, 2002

Final Score:

Duck Farts	12
Salty Sud & Studs	5

Rejoice!  Rejoice!  The Duck Farts have won!  In what has to be one of the biggest upsets in Tallahassee Dart League history, the 0-11 Duck Farts soundly defeated the first placed Salty Sud & Studs last night at the Hobbit Hoagie Golden Tee.  The night was dampened at the onset by the absence of our team captain, Leroy, who was at home caring for his mom.  But, he was there in spirit, and the Duck Farts dedicated the night to him.  Mike substituted admirably, and his optimistic outlook may have been the shot in the arm this team needed.  We knew all season that we were capable of winning in this division, but we could never get over that elusive hump.  Tonight was different.  We seemed to hit the outs when it counted, the triples and bulls-eyes when we needed them, and very few games escaped us.  In singles, we won three of the four matches:  Andrew swept Calvin; Mike swept Sheila; Erik beat John in 3 games; and Rachael lost both to Mark.   We played even with Salty Sud & Studs in doubles:  Andrew & Mike beat John & Sheila in both games, while Erik & Rachael fell to Calvin & Mark in two.  That left us with a three point lead (8-5) going into 4-man.  Knowing that we only needed to win one of the games to claim our first victory, the Duck Farts bore down.  We played tight, but well in the first game, and Erik found coolness in the end to hit the out.  A celebration erupted, and play was halted briefly to acknowledge our accomplishment throughout the establishment.  With that pressure lifted, the Duck Farts swept through the next game to claim the impressive seven point victory.  We'll have an extra week to revel in our joy, as we take a bye before resuming with the last quarter of the season on May 22nd.

Bonus Points:
Erik had 6.
Andrew had 3.
Mike had 1.

May 22, 2002

Final Score:

Duck Farts	8
Fantasy Darts	12

The Duck Farts failed in our attempt for a two game winning streak last night at the Salty Dawg.   The bye week seemed to have adversely affected our darts, as we got off to a very slow start.  However, we recovered and were throwing very well by the end of the night.  In singles, Rachael won 1 of 3 games against Dave, Erik won a game over Jeff, Andrew was swept by Keith, and Leroy was swept by Travis.  In doubles, each team won 1 game while losing 2.  Rachael and Andrew fell to Dave and Travis, while Leroy and Erik lost to Keith and Jeff.  Going into 4-man, we were losing by a 12-4 margin.  We've suffered many defeats this season, but have thus far avoided a maximum 16 point night put on us ... though sometimes narrowly.   We faced the prospect again last night before the 601 match.  But the Duck Farts united, and we blew out the Fantasy Darts in both games.  That closed the final score to a respectable 4 point loss, and gave us hope for the final 3 weeks of the season.

Bonus Points:
Erik had 4.
Andrew and Rachael had 3.
Leroy had 2.

May 29, 2002

Final Score:

Duck Farts	5
Luski Bluski	12

Last night at the Salty Dawg, the Duck Farts dropped another match that was well within our grasp.  Sure, the final score looks like a blowout ... but we trailed only by 3 points going into 4-man.  A two game sweep by the good guys, and we would have walked away 9-8 winners.  Instead, Luski Bluski were the ones winning both games, thus sending the Duck Farts away with our second consecutive loss.  The night started decent enough.  Leroy downed Duski in 2 games and Erik took a game from Ish.  But, Rachael (to Kelly) and Andrew (to Lewis) were both swept in their singles matches to make the score 6-3 after singles.  We played even in doubles:  Leroy and Erik swept Lewis and Duski, while Andrew & Rachael lost both games to Ish and Kelly.  That is where we found ourselves in the 3 point hole with only 4-man to play.  We played well in 4-man, but our opponents were better and edged us in both games.  Leroy played his best darts of the season ... winning singles and doubles and finishing with 10 bonus points.  We ended up the season 0-4 against Luski Bluski, but 3 of the 4 matches were decided in the final event.

Bonus Points:
Leroy had 10.
Erik had 3.
Andrew had 2.

June 5, 2002

Final Score:

Duck Farts	4
Back Breakers	12

In a match reminiscent of our early season woes, the Duck Farts were wiped out last night at the Hobbit Hoagie Sauna and Rumor Forum.  We began by being swept in every game in singles and doubles, but ended with a flurry in 601.  Singles was abysmal:  Erik was swept by Ernie, Leroy by Chris, Andrew by Clint and Rachael by Tracey.  Doubles wasn't any better as Rachael and Andrew lost both games to Ernie and Chris, while Leroy and Erik were swept by Clint and Tracey.  Facing the prospect of being shutout, we buckled down and really played well in 4-man.  Erik particularly dominated the 1st game.  After Rachael doubled in, Erik hit a 134 and a 121 before doubling out to win the game for the Duck Farts, thus avoiding further embarrassment.  The whole team played well in the second game, and we won handily.  We conclude the season next week at the Salty Dawg against the Salty Sud and Studs team, who will certainly be out for revenge.

Bonus Points:
Erik had 8.
Andrew had 3
Leroy had 1.